SD: Divas, A Wedding. . .Oh Yeah, And A Pay-Per-View
Friday, September 14th, 2007
SMACKDOWN - 9/14/2007
With the Red Sox and Yankees going head to head, I'm lucky enough to be able to watch this with remote in hand via DVD. . .
Michelle McCool vs Victoria - what a way to open the show, with Michelle and Chuck Palumbo coming out on his bike. Get ready for the ride of your life. Kenny Dykstra leads Victoria to the ring. . .they kinda have that Shawn Michaels-Sherri Martel thing going, only Victoria is old enough to be Kenny's dad. Remember about a year ago when Kenny was doing jobs on PPV main events?? Victoria is sporting a t-shirt in this match, makes you wonder if it is Wellness-related. This turns into a mixed tag team match that nobody cares about half way through due to the outside interference. Teddy Long supposedly made this announcement during the commercial break, which really baffles the mind. 18 minutes into the show and it's finally over with big Chuck and Big Michelle getting the win.
Jesse and Festus (or whatever their names are) are hanging with Teddy for his surprise bachelor party. Butch Reed makes his first appearance for WWE since 1988. Teddy's son, Sgt. Slaughter, the Major Brothers and some rats are all there having a blast. FF. . .
For the first time on network television, Batista vs Great Khali. . .I believe this is the first time I've had the pleasure of seeing these two warriors collide since I don't order their PPV's. . .
Mark Henry is in ring talking about his match with Unforgiven Sunday and shows a video of how strong he is. In what can't be much of a surprise to anyone, the Undertaker's "hocus pocus," as Mark calls it, comes on the screen. Really cool video, and my money says that his return boosts the PPV numbers. It won't compare to last years Unforgiven, but that show had both a TLC match and Hell In The Cell.
More diva bullshit that nobody cares about and nobody will pay money to see. . .why push this when there's a PPV on Sunday???
Matt Hardy and MVP play chess when Matt alerts MVP that he booked a match for him as captain of the team. . .this gimmick of feuding partners usually gets over. . .
Highlights of the big Hornswoggle/Jamie Noble feud, with Noble slipping on Hornswoggle's marbles. Ugh. Noble squares off with Shannon Moore, who doesn't look like much without his face paint and wild hair. Talk about a match that nobody cares about. Moore beats Noble with a roll-up after pretending Hornswoggle was at ringside. . .
Kristal and Vickie Guerrero meet in the hall for her surprise bridal shower. All of the Smackdown divas and even the rats from ECW are there for the fun. . .
In another match for the ages, MVP faces Domino one-on-one. At least it's to advance the storyline headed into their tag title match at the PPV. I can't express how badly I hate the Deuce and Domino gimmick. The worst theme song, the worst look. Matt Hardy comes out to watch the big match. He starts goading the crowd by chanting "MVP" into the mic while the fans follow with "sucks!" Fans had fun with it, interesting to see if it takes. MVP wrestled in his suit pants and tank top. Domino gets the win with a small package as MVP is distracted by Hardy and Deuce going at it outside the ring. . .
We have highlights of the revelation of Vince's bastard son from Raw. . .I guess it wasn't a bad dream. . .
Look, we have the WWE writer that writes himself onto the TV shows for an extra payday stripping for the ladies at the bachelor party. . .the big wedding is next Friday. . .I have a feeling this isn't going to have Randy-Liz type interest. . .or even Billy & Chuck for that matter. . .
Khali and his manager (the writer who writes himself into the TV shows for an extra payday) that still apparently doesn't have a name lays the law down in the back about Unforgiven. . .
Kane vs Fit Finlay in a Belfast Brawl - Finlay jumps Kane on his way to the ring, not a bad match at all. Kane is usually hit or miss. . .he was hit here. It's amazing that fans cheer him after he raped Lita a couple of summers ago. Can you believe he's been a top guy on national television for ten straight years now?? That's very impressive. How many times has he turned in that ten years?? Solid match. . .
More diva bullshit. . .more bachelor party bullshit. Kristal is jealous of the pigs with Teddy, Teddy isn't happy about Dick Johnson's dancing. . .Ron Simmons arrives with one word in mind. . .yeah, that one. Michael Cole is at ringside with more fake enthusiasm that's a huge turnoff. They rundown a few matches taking place at Unforgiven, spending less time on a PPV fans are supposed to spend $40 on then a waste of time diva contest and a wedding no one wants to see. . .
Batista vs Great Khali - JBL says "this is unbelievable." It sure is. Khali bumps for the spine buster. . .how many times in one week are you going to have your only giant bump on free television??? He might suck but at least he's a freak and different than the cookie cutter wrestlers they have on all three brands. The Khali Vice Grip is getting over. . .the angle with Mysterio where he bled from the mouth was really cool looking. . .Khali gets DQ'd for not breaking it while Batista was in the ropes. . .and that's a wrap. . .
Where the hell was Mysterio?? Overall, I like the fact that this show has longer matches and less talking, only problems is half the matches suck. I don't know what this did to build excitement for the PPV. . .they spent too much time on divas, weddings and everything else that should be background scenery compared to MONEY MAKING pay-per-views. . .