TNA: Black Machis-oh-no!
Thursday, September 13th, 2007
TNA Impact: 9/13/2007
TNA Impact opens with a little highlight package of No Surrender. . .got over the main matches and angles pretty good. . .
Christian, Tomko and his mysterious championship belt along with AJ Styles make their way into the building. They're looking for Matt Morgan. Christian will face the Samoan of Samoa Joe's choice, he said it could be Afa, Sika or Don Hoe. AJ started singing "tiny bubbles in my wine. . ." It's always good to make one of the best wrestlers in the world a comedic idiot that no one will take seriously or pay money to see. Ugh. . .
Karen Angle makes her way to the ring. . .how many times will we get to see Karen this week?? Karen lied about Sting hitting her at the PPV. She introduces Kurt but makes Sting comes out. Sting wants Karen to come clean about him not hitting her. . .she said she hit her head and doesn't remember. Geez, did anyone think to watch the tape?? Or would that require someone having the common sense of a three year old?? Kurt was hiding under a flag and hammer Sting with a chair. Kurt handcuffs Sting and really lays a beating down. I liked this part of the angle. Angle vs Sting at Bound For Glory is announced, which is a solid main event for TNA's big event of the year. Karen slapped away at Sting while he was handcuffed, Sting spit at them. This was intense, I just wished the whole storyline wasn't
Abyss was in the back, talking, once again. I hate, hate, hate the fact that he now speaks. Hate it with a passion. If he loses tonight to Angle in the cage via submission, he's out of TNA. I have a feeling he's not tapping. . .
Here comes Black Reign, the former Goldust/Dustin Rhodes. Reign looks like a 320 pound La Parka with a wig. His opponent tonight is Shark Boy. Looks like we have a nice enhancement match for Reign. Mike Tenay makes the announcement for the two hours Impact, which I'm looking forward to. Reign wins a quick squash. Post match, Reign nails Shark Boy with a spike, thinking he's Roy Scheider. He then takes off Shark's mask and puts his rat inside of it. Annie?? Luckily Eric Young pulls Shark Boy out of the ring before any more damage is done. . .
The new useless female interviewer Crystal is backstage with Ron Killing and Adam Jones. Killings was talking about handing out cans of whoop ass. Where have I heard that one before?? Jones sends a shout out to his boys on the Titans, saying he can't wait to get back to the NFL. That really puts over TNA.
Black Machismo vs Christopher Daniels - Machismo is fresh off his big victory over Kurt Angle and headed to MWF FULL THROTTLE September 29th. Machismo is led to the ring by The Guru, who I have a feeling will not sell one ticket or PPV under that gimmick. Has Elix Skipper even wrestled since he came back?? Hopefully Senshi will see more in-ring action with the two hour program, as he's one of the best. Daniels surprisingly goes over clean in this non-title match after he holds onto the ropes during the Lethal Combination. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Machismo gets the biggest win of his life by pinning Angle and he's treated like a jobber on the first TV after?? When he won the X Division Title back at Slammiversary, he lost the belt to Samoa Joe on the following Impact. Why make the champion look weak?? I realize they're building to a Machismo-Daniels title match at Bound For Glory, but what about having Daniels go over on the Guru and have the rest of XXX triple team him post match, leading to Machismo making the save?? Why have him do a CLEAN job in the middle when you have a chance to elevate him to a top spot by pinning the world champion?? I don't get it, I hate it, it's everything that's wrong with professional wrestling, sports entertainment or whatever the hell you want to call it in 2007. . .
Backstage, Jim Cornette starts to rundown some of the big matches for Bound For Glory. . .there will be a 15 man Fight For The Right reverse battle royal. . .that gimmick royally sucked on free TV last year. . .LAX vs XXX in an Ultimate X. . .lots of X's in that one and it sounds like the best match of the show so far. . .plus, a 10 "knockout" (TNA diva) battle royal. How many battle royals does one show need?? TNA is finally starting up a women's division. My feelings are well known on this one, they don't need it when they have so many quality guys that aren't over and misused. We know five of the knockouts, five will be new. Maybe I'll reserve judgement until I see who they're bringing in. WWF had a decent women's division earlier in the decade if they weren't eye candy. I'd like it to be a division where the fans can at least respect the wrestling. . .
Christian and company call Matt Morgan out to the ring after the commercial break. Good promo by Christian. . .the three get ready to attack Morgan but Samoa Joe saves the day. Morgan announces that he will be the special enforcer for Christian vs Joe at Bound For Glory. Interesting to see if the elevation of Morgan will work. Cornette comes out and says he authorized Morgan as enforcer, and announces that next week Christian will face the former Rikishi - Junior Phatu - next week on Impact. Good to see MWF friend Rikishi in TNA. . .
They cut to a quick clip of Angle and Abyss' history, they come back to the ring area where the cage is already set-up. We're talking thirty seconds. We need that ring crew in the MWF. To me, this was almost a reenactment of Michaels-Undertaker Hell In The Cell when Kane debuted during the championship match. Good match, Angle bled, they kept teasing that Abyss was going to leave TNA if he taps. I don't think one fan actually was buying that part of the deal. Abyss put Angle in the ankle lock and Judias Messiah or whatever his name is pops up from under the ring with lots of smoke. He strangles Abyss with barbed wire. Angle opens the door and rolls out of the cage. Abyss gets nailed with several hard, unprotected chair shots. With all that has come out about concussions of late, can we cool it?? Judias drops broken glass all over the ring and proceeds to cut open Abyss' arm with the broken glass. Very violent. I like it, but can you imagine doing that at a kids amusement park?? "Hey kids, do you want to go on the Shrek ride or watch the wrestlers cut each other open with glass?"
A watchable show. . .a couple of good angles. . .and a lot of nonsense that takes away from the credibility of the championships and the athletes. . .that's never, ever a good thing. . .